Sunday, September 29, 2013

Philippians 4:6-7

I have been putting off writing this post for about 2 weeks now... But a few friends have been asking if I have gotten any results from the RE, so I am here to update the world.

I finally got the call a few weeks ago... "Mrs. Braschler, nothing was flagged as unusual and every test came back in the normal range."... Come again? I then made the nurse go through each and every result (all 19 of them) and tell me they were normal, just to be sure. 
After asking all kinds of questions she was unable to answer, she said I should make an appointment with my doctor to discuss a game plan.

I hung up and told my Mom the news (she was right there since I was visiting family in Colorado). Luckily my Mother is wonderful and knows me so well. Her response was, "BUMMER." She understood that this was not good news. When it comes to medical conditions, most people would jump for joy at normal. But my sweet Mom knew this was just another dead end to a exhausting road. 
That night I took some time to consult the Lord about my annoyance with His timing in creating my second child. In all honesty I was really hoping God would feel bad for me and put a baby in my tummy right then and there. God cares deeply for us, but He doesn't care much for time.
I pray for my children each night, and I know God will provide. I don't know when, in what way, or how hard the journey there will be... but I know one day He will provide.

For those of you who know me, you may consider me a patient person, and with most things I am, but when it comes to trying to conceive, I am the least patient person you will ever meet! I get frustrated with my body, obsessed with every twinge and deeply depressed with every period. But I have recently found a calm place in all this. I have been patient and even considering waiting a year before seeing any more doctors. Friends, this is not ME... this patience and peace can only come from one source: The LORD. I have kept Him at arms length in all of this for 18 months, recently I began praying for peace and patience and to my surprise HE delivered immediately. I will not take this peace for granted and I will revel in it as long as it lives in me.

So what now? We will keep trying in as many natural ways as possible to get my cycles back on track. Right now pregnancy is no longer my goal.  My goal is to get my body in a good rhythm and begin ovulating. This will take TIME. Which, luckily, I have :)